Thursday, April 16, 2009

Beauty School Drop Out

I opened a branch of my cosmetology college in Athens last night, with great acclaim. I will be teaching the basic elements of how to beautify oneself for oneself through oneself. Operating from the principles that too much is never enough and that being terrible at something shouldn't ever stop you from doing it, I am offering a very reasonably priced course in the glamorous application of maqueillage.

So if you want to look like you got into a fistfight with a truck driver after your six year old niece gave you a makeover whilst you were passed out from a whisky binge (and frankly, who doesn't?) then I am literally your person!

My first client was Jeffrey Gordon Baker, just the basics.


Then I did myself - masterclass round.


Beautiful, Successful People.


Here our dear friend Ms Eva Le Blanc tries to get in on the action.


That noise my love, is the sound of Pat McGrath turning in her grave.

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